"When I was in college, I got a panicked phone call from my sibling. Apparently my mom was looking for my passport (rifling through my room) and came across a large baggy of white powder she assumed to be cocaine. She continues to search and found a man thong and the empty box to a vibrator. She put all this together in her head and logically concluded I was, in her words, 'selling my sweet a-- for coke'. She proceeded to call my siblings in hysterics. First off, the bag she found was chalk powder left over from a high school art project, so not even remotely similar to coke. Second, the man thong was a gag gift that I hadn't gotten rid of. Third, the vibrator was for my gf and I had no idea then box was still in my room. To this day, 10 years later, my siblings love to ask me how 'selling my sweet a-- for coke' is going. Basically my mom found chalk powder, a gag gift and an empty box for my girlfriends vibrator and assumes that I'm a manwhore for coke" (Source).
"I was cleaning my 8 year old step son's bedroom because it was overrun by toys. When I got to the closet where it seemed he liked to toss toys in an attempt to clean his room himself, I was hit with a horrid smell. I grabbed everything out of there, toys, dirty clothes and came across a paper grocery bag crumpled up. I was afraid to open it as that was where the smell was coming from. I opened it to find a wadded up pair of underwear caked in dried sh-t. The smell was so intense I ran to the bathroom to vomit. I never said anything to him about it as he clearly had an accident and was trying to hide it" (Source).
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