"I went to pick up my 4-year-old girl from her nursery. When I got there, the nursery nurse asked for a quick word about 'soft hands' (this is basically what they say anytime kids raise a hand to one another).
She told me that my little girl had punched a boy in the face, but she started giggling and struggling to keep a straight face. Perplexed I asked why and kind of started giggling myself.
'She said he was "Happy at her."'
I took her home and asked her what had happened, basically this little boy had walked up to her and with a giant smile and shouted, 'Hi Chloe!' She whacked him.
I told her in the car how you cant hit people blah blah and that if she was sorry we wouldn't tell her mummy. Queue mum coming home from work. 'Mummy, I hit a boy in the face!'
My wife turns to me and says 'Why did she hit someone in the face?' I had a beanie hat on, so I pulled it over my face and just burst out laughing.
'I hit him because he was happy at me, mum!'
Now if you ask me, that's as good a reason as any! It was a Monday after all!" (Source)
"Usually we give our 8-month-old baths in the tub, but if we're pressed for time I just bring him into the shower with me. A few days ago, he wriggled off my shoulder, fell forward, flipped around in the air, and I caught him two inches from hitting the tub floor. She doesn't need to know, he doesn't need to know. It's nice to know that I have Dad Reflexes though" (Source)
"I built a treehouse in the woods behind our house for our eldest. I decided to jump on the floor to prove it was strong enough to support us. It was, but the old oak tree limb wasn't. Luckily I was still young and the fall wasn't too high.
The two older kids laughed their a--es off and I spent a couple of weeks doing my best to hide bruises and little cuts from my wife. Fast forward about 20 years and we're all laughing and telling stories. This is the one that my wife brings up. Apparently the youngest blabbed as soon as Mommy got home. My wife let me suffer in silence to see how long the rest of us would keep our little conspiracy of silence" (Source)
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