I used to work with elderly people and one of my clients was a former pilot that finally quit when he realized in the middle of a flight his dementia had progressed and he couldn't remember where he was supposed to be flying to. Meaning he had been flying for a commercial airline with dementia for quite some time before that.Source
Keep your shoes on. Keep. Your. Shoes. On.
The floor is so filthy it's ridiculous. And that isn't water you are feeling.
Also if you ask to be upgraded to a better seat in economy, we will have you pay.
However, if you just sit down and act inconspicuous, we won't notice or care.Source
My last flight an elderly man accidentally s--- on the floor, stepped in it, and walked on like it was nothing. DO NOT WALK AROUND BAREFOOT. Pee and poop happens, all over. I feel like I witness an "accident" regularly; in their seat or in the lav. People get nose bleeds, or their wounds open. Obviously when we land, it is thoroughly cleaned. But inflight our resources are limited. DON'T CHANGE YOUR BABY'S DIAPER ON THE TRAY TABLE. This also happens all the time. It's unsanitary and people use the tray table to eat, put their personal things on, etc.Source
I was cabin crew for five years - long haul only - and whilst we've all passed the exams and tests and bla bla bla and have a refresher every year, you never really know how anyone will react in any kind of emergency. Firemen and police are tested on a weekly basis, but in the five years i was crew, there was nothing I personally experienced that put any of the proper training into use, and I'd like to think I'd not not freeze or fall to pieces, but you just never know.
So definitely pay a bit of attention for the three mins of the safety demo and figure out where the nearest exit and it's alternative are because you never know, you might end up having to help yourself.Source
My father is a pilot and apparently one time when he was flying a flight back to Australia, the champion Australian rugby team was flying back on his flight. They rented out the entirety of first class, and the moment the flight reached cruising altitude, stripped down to their boxers. Allegedly they were some of the most polite patrons he had seen, but were just mostly naked.Source
On a Delta flight a few months ago, I sat down and my seat belt felt wet. I smelled my hands...and vomit. I asked the flight attendant if someone had thrown up in the seat before me, and she said "I'm sorry, I watched them clean it up three times." Disgusted, I asked for a different seat - nope, full flight. Couldn't take a later, because we had my son and it was getting late. So, went to unbuckle my seat...and little pieces of vomit fell out from the buckle on to my lap. Yup. DELTA AIRLINES. Washed my hands, they gave me 10k bonus miles and kept me sufficiently drunk on the flight that my wife had to drive home. I did shower as soon as I walked in the door and threw my clothes in the wash. Still amazed at that one, considering I was told by a former plane crew that replacing seat belts and seat cushions is a pretty quick and painless process.Source
Yes, on trans-oceanic flights there is a cabin for crew to get some sleep. No, you won't be invited in for fun times. On some newer planes there's also a hold for people who have died on the flight. No, you won't be invited in for fun times either.
If you piss off the cabin crew they will fart on you. The pressure on aircraft makes you naturally gassy and it's easy to puff one off in the face of an annoying git while bending down to speak to someone on the opposite side of the aisle.
If a meal service is on offer go for the kosher option, so you know it was prepared that day.Source
I dated a flight attendant for a while. One thing I haven't seen mentioned is that sometimes delays are caused by Flight attendants not showing up and the airline scrambling to get a back-up scheduled. Like a flight attendant was partying too hard last night and decided to call off 2 hours before that $1500 cross ocean flight you just popped on.
She loved to party as did a lot of her coworkers and were often hungover or "out of it" on flights. Even though pay was shit, their union made it very hard to get fired so call-offs were kind of no-big-deal.Source
A flight attendant told me that in the event of a situation where passengers have to cover their heads you do not 'lock' your fingers over head but place one hand on top of the other. If something falls on your hand/head, you'll still have one good hand to use.Source
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