It's just what it sounds like: A gluestick made of butter instead of adhesive. While it may be an inventive solution to the sometimes frustrating task of spreading butter onto a piece of toast, the idea is just kind of disturbing. And heaven forbid you confuse it with an actual gluestick!
These pennyloafer parasols make absolutely NO SENSE! Won't a regular umbrella also cover your shoes? Also the umbrellas don't even cover the whole shoe, and the bottoms are going to get wet anyway. On top of all that, why would anyone walk around with these embarrassing eyesores?
Okay, now this HAS to be a joke right? Thankfully, it turns out that it is. The novelty gift made a big splash in 2009 and is a great gag gift for an especially gullible friend.
Nearly every beverage has its own diet-friendly alternative, even water. Japanese beverage company Sapporo added "specialized peptide bonds" to their water and sells is under the name "diet water." Of course, regular water is still actually the best diet beverage out there.
Concealed Barefoot Shoes
If you've ever wanted to walk around barefoot without anyone knowing, then these bottomless shoes are perfect for you. Most people don't have this desire, however. If you have to conceal your barefootedness, then maybe you shouldn't be barefoot...
For those impatient eaters that don't want to wait a minute before they dig into their noodles, this bulky fan is one eye-catching solution. We don't see how this would be any more efficient than just blowing on your noodles, though.
These bulky pants completely fail in both form and function. Not only are these saggy pants absolutely hideous to look at, but trying to eat off of them requires you to keep your legs completely still. Just get a blanket and save yourself the ridicule.
Two Person Sweatshirt
This might be a great idea for conjoined twins, but anybody that is not actually physically connected to another person should intensely avoid this product. Not only will going anywhere basically turn into a three-legged race, but anybody who sees you in this will mock you for the rest of your life.
Solar Powered Cigarette
Any "coolness factor" that people might associate with cigarette smoking immediately goes away when someone tries to light up with a magnifying glass. Not only would this process take minutes of waiting, but it would also only work in the sunlight. Just get a lighter.
Revolving Ice Cream Cone
Every ice cream cone eater knows the importance of paying equal attention to all sides of the cone to catch drips and avoid toppling. While this invention does underly this important eating strategy, it is just lazy. Just turn the cone yourself — it's not that hard. Plus, you can't eat these cones, which is half the reason you get a cone in the first place!
Subway Sleep Devices
People won't judge you for drifting off in the subway (we've all been there!), but they WILL judge you for using intricate devices to help that process along. This chin rest and plunger helmet are two of the most egregious subway don'ts.
Head Mounted Toilet Paper Dispenser
Why!? There really is no excuse at all for wearing this. Sure, maybe you want to keep some tissue around during allergy season, but you can just keep a packet in your purse or pockets. You do NOT need to be wearing an entire roll of toilet paper on your head.
The idea is to make potty training easier, but giving your defecating baby an iPad just seems unnecessary and pointless. Not only will the baby probably just paw at the screen obliviously, but he or she will also probably get some pretty disgusting stuff on your iPad. Wait a few more years before you get your kid addicted to technology.
While it is a great idea to walk your dog often, your goldfish gets its exercise from swimming around in its aquarium. Despite this, there is an actual Goldfish Walker device available for purchase.
Do you want to be really sure that nobody can see what you're doing on your phone or computer while also looking incredibly awkward? The privacy scarf really just draws more attention to your computer use than it deflects — what are you trying SO hard to hide? It also comes at the price of seeing literally anything else that's going on in the world.
Lipstick Application Mask
This stencil is meant to help ladies apply their lipstick, which is a task that actually isn't very difficult. Not only that, but the mask appears to have a rather large hole that would probably only be suitable for Angelina Jolie. And the comparisons to Hannibal Lector's mask just leap out, as well...
Have trouble keeping track of your remote controls? Put on this velcro face mask! The idea of walking around with your remotes suck to your head really seems like more of a problem than a solution.